Monday, July 17, 2017

A new chapter

Wow. Where do i even begin? 

I was accepted into UKM's Law School back in September 2015, i was in my first semester and alot of things happened in that very semester itself. Being in an IPTA gives you alot of exposure in alot of things, and it all depends on you to deconstruct it and take the good side of it. It really depends on you. You mix with the right people, you be in the right environment,  you contribute, give and take, you're good to go. 

But i mean, that really is very subjective to say. The right combination depends on you, whether you like it or not. Its a try and error process that you gotta go through cause the only way to survive is to go through it. 

Be it college wise or faculty wise, both have their own prospects and interest. I went with the flow, obviously. And made mistakes, obviously. But thats all in the process of learning, outside of class. I had no idea how organizing a program is such a norm in your varsity life, and that applies if you do take part in these kind of activities. You name it, be it a carnival, a charity run, a humanitarian expedition, a debating championship, and even an orchestra competition. Its up to your creativity and effort to make it work. 

In UKM, we have our MPP (Majlis Perwakilan Pelajar) which represents the students at the varsity level, we have our PMF (Persatuan Mahasiswa Fakulti) which represents the students at the faculty, we have our MEP (Majlis Eksekutif Pelajar) which represent the students at their residential college, we have our Persatuan Anak Negeri, also co-curricular clubs. Now thats a hell lot. And it all depends on you to get involved or not. 

Towards the end of my second semester, i went for the MEP interview of my residential college, and was given the mandate as an Academics and International Affairs Executive for the 2016/17 term. Kemain nama kan. 

Yet again, it was my choice to go to the interview, cause i wanted to experience being in an organisation in my university life. I mean, you really wont get the experience anywhere else. Of course, it had its up and downs. But i realize being pessimistic and negative wont get you anywhere except being miserable and bringing everyone down. People will end up hating you for being negative all the time. So you gotta live with your decisions. 

Like i mentioned before, organizing a program is such a norm. So referring to the position i was in, i had to organize two different programs for two different set of audience. One under my Academics portfolio, and one under my International Affairs portfolio. Maybe i'll explain more about my programs in another post.

But what i wanna share is that, despite having a very hectic semester, it taught me alot. Being in that particular organisation itself, really taught me alot. It also taught me that people would do anything for power. Nevertheless, i'm grateful for all the chances and opportunities i was given, especially the trust to hold such portfolios. 

My studies? Hahahaha well my first semester was pretty promising, but now that i've finished my second year of law school, it made me stop and think whether i really want this or not. Of course, thats just the demotivated me speaking. When we're down and just feeling hopeless, all sorts of negativity starts to mix with what you really want. 

I guess i dont really know. What i do know is that i wont get anywhere by whining and complaining. I just gotta suck it up and move forward. Afterall, you cant outwit fate by placing little side bets on the outcome of life. Its either you wade in and play or you dont play at all.  -Judith McNaught.


Blogging again!

Its been a good two years since i last blog. I have no idea why i stopped writing, i just.. ran out of motivation to even write, i guess. And the past two years had taught me alot, and i really mean alot. I dont even know where to start.

Alot of things happened.

And i mean alot.

Friendship, studies, sports career, and even building network and leadership skills. Yeah sure everything has its up and downs, not denying that we should always be grateful for what we have, but as a human being, i guess we would always want more. We expect more out of our effort, out of our eagerness to get what we want, but we forget that we only get what we deserve, when we deserve it. Mak aih, ouch sangat.


I look forward to start writing again, cause we all need a way to vent out our frustrations. I forgot how fun writing was, being able to express ourselves in the most straight forward way. It doesnt really matter if nobody reads it. As someone that really loves to talk, to share my stories, writing a post gives me a satisfaction of being able to share it in a platform like this blog.

Till the next post.


Sunday, July 19, 2015

Selamat Hari Raya!



Sunday, July 5, 2015

Bits and pieces into its place

For the past few months, i couldn't help myself but to think that life has so so much to offer but i wasted two years looking through high school romance and bullshits like that. But since the day i pledged that i would change for the better, i realized that almost everything that happens has its own philosophy. Cliche, i know.

Every single thing that you do, every step, every routine, everything; has its lessons. For example, i came across this odd idea while doing the dishes. Why do we stack the smaller plates on top of the larger ones? Why don't we put the smaller ones on the bottom or randomly put it in the middle? Because if we do so, the stack would be unstable and it will tumble over. Same goes in real life. If we give the younger lads (which are lack of experience and has a higher chance of flipping over everything) with bigger responsibilities than the ones with much more experience and patience, wouldn't the whole system go down the drain?

Anyway, that's half of what i wanted to say. But you can't deny that what i stated was true. Everything has its lessons. Be it doing the dishes or going to work, everything can be made into a life lesson and philosophies (which sometimes may not be a good thing, but whatever)

My point is, after having to take a few months to recover from the idiocy i brought to myself, i'm finally gaining my sanity back and i finally feel like i'm having a grip of my own life again. True, age doesn't define maturity. I don't claim to be "matured enough", but being "matured enough" is so overrated and subjective. But i definitely feel much more different than how i felt six months ago.

For example, I finally learn where to put my gift and talent of talking into work. As i mentioned in the previous post, i'm currently coaching silat here and there. For the first time in my five years of coaching silat, i finally get to get my hands on a group of students that has a higher level of concentration and adherence compared to those i coached before ((so mean of me to mengata my own students)). Every instruction, every command is fulfilled without complaints. They obeyed and followed orders accordingly which made me want to go to a corner and have my proud coach moment. Kah. Anyway my point is, i finally made use of my talent in talking and persuading.

I've always wanted to feel the pleasure and satisfaction of teaching and guiding people, like a teacher. However i've always doubted myself whether i'm capable of teaching a group of kids which may or may not be interested in what i had to say. So the dream of being an educator stops there, because of my own insecurities. However after given the chance to meet this group of amazing kids, i'm beginning to think that maybe i should give it a try. God knows when or where, though. But i will try to get myself into a classroom and actually teach, formally.

Things are finally falling into its place, and i'm excited to see what life has to offer me in the days to come. Be it hell or high water, i'm more than glad to stand my ground and prove that the Aina i was looking for is still here, deep inside. I just need to keep on looking.

Semoga Tuhan redha.

Happy 18th Ramadhan!